Princess Charity

Today I am officially closer to 40 than I am to 30.
Yikes.

I'm sure you are wondering how I spent this birthday of mine. I would like to inform you that I spent the day living my dream. I have dreamed of doing many things throughout my life. Around 5th grade, inspired by my love of history and my fascination with Indiana Jones, I wanted to be an archeologist.
Later, I had a dream to go to the National Spelling Bee. Seriously. I wanted to do that. The closest I got was 18th in the state in 7th grade. I got out on the word repartee.
Off and on I had the dream of being in the Olympics. It seems every sport I tried out I thought maybe I'd make it. Especially when I got into swimming. As a distance freestyler, I was hoping
to be the next Janet Evans.

In High School, I was in the plays, and enjoyed those too. I dreamed of being on stage. I use to think it would be cool just to get to act in a commercial. These dreams came and went and changed throughout the years, but one dream I always remember having. From the time I can remember I always longed for this.

I wanted to be a mom.

So, you see, today on my birthday, I got to live my dream. Of course, I have had the pleasure of living that dream for the last 14 1/2 years, but that's not what I was thinking about today. As I pondered all the things I could hope for on my birthday, I wondered to myself, "what have I always wanted?". And I had one of those moments. You know what I mean. I realized that I was one of the lucky people to HAVE what I had always wanted. A family, with a loving husband, and wonderful children.

Do I always remember that this is my dream? NO. Do I ever wonder why this is my dream? YES. But perhaps the same would be true if I were digging for days on end as an archeologist (or worse yet sitting in a library studying for years just hoping to get somewhere to dig). Or studying spelling words instead of hanging out with friends, or swimming till I wanted to die, or auditioning yet another time for that elusive acting job. The fact is, any dream comes with it's challenges, it's ups and downs. So, why should I expect any different from motherhood? I came across a quote that sums up the idea very nicely:

Motherhood brings as much joy as ever, but it still brings boredom, exhaustion, and sorrow too. Nothing else ever will make you as happy or as sad, as proud or as tired, for nothing is quite as hard as helping a person develop his own individuality especially while you struggle to keep your own.
- Marguerite Kelly and Elia Parsons

So, today I lived the life of a Princess. Not in the sense that I sat on a throne, or wore a crown of jewels, or was waited on hand and foot (though my family was very good to me). But Princesses get to live their dreams, and that's just what I got to do today.t